Difference between pages "The Great Stomping" and "Legend of Bunny Staplus"

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=== Date observed & holiday substituted for ===
According to the holy texts, the Legend of [[Bunny Staplus]] is as follows:
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Held during the first week of [[April]]. Substitution for [[Easter]] and [[Spring Equinox]].
 
=== Origins ===
----
This holiday celebrates the death of [[Wang Sorenson]], the shanty-singing pirate of Tuvalu. Wang was murdered by the Elephant Mafia after he performed the [[Peanut Miracle at Boobyalla]]. According to the testament of his friends, he knew it was coming and spent the night before getting blistering drunk, loudly singing every obscene sea shanty he could think of, replacing every instance of "balls" with "elephants." In the morning, he stumbled into the town square and defiantly threw peanut shells onto the ground. An hour later, the hit was carried out and Wang Sorenson was crushed under the feet of a hit-elephant.
 
=== Traditions & rituals ===
----
The only agreed-upon traditions of The Great Stomping is beating an elephant-shaped pinata while yelling "elephant balls!" until it spills peanuts and peanut candy. This holiday is celebrated only by a breakaway [[Wangite]] sects known as [[Wangians]]. The [[Holy Ingemodh Mother of Wang Cathedral]] and most Wangites do not recognize this holiday as it's "too depressing" and "not keeping in the spirit of Wang.""


<blockquote>''In Post 87 [[EdtheCabinet]] prophet of Bunny Staplus did say''<br>
----
<br>
#''We’re not in Kansas anymore?''
'''See index: [[Wang]]'''
#''(Who am I kidding, if the Rapture happened, I would so totally be one of the people left behind to raid all the taco Hells and re-colonize IKEA. So yeah, the zombies can wait until Easter. Remind me to stock up on [[bunny ears]] and staples.)''
#''THE ALPACA FLIES AT MIDNIGHT?''
#''…pation.'' <br>
<br>
''And the seed of the Staplus was planted. And the seed did take root in the mind of [[Justnet]] who then said “I just totally pictured you going around Ikea stapling bunny ears to random pieces of furniture.”'' <br>
<br>
''EdtheCabinet did reply: “(I was thinking zombies, but, you know, furniture should have ears, now that you mention it…)” and [[Rwest81]] did take up the [[Holy Stapler]] and produced [[this image]] for the delectation of the posters.'' <br>
<br>
''And the posters did mark the image as interesting, funny, agree, and love. And Justnet did protest that the chair was ugly, and that EdtheCabinet should not have begun stapling without her, and EdtheCabinet was sore upset that Justnet should have seen the chair, which was to have been her [[Cthulhumas]] present and disharmony did threaten the [[Nativity Thread]].'' <br>
<br>
''Then Rwest81 did apologize for ruining the surprise, and EdtheCabinet did accept her apology and harmony was restored.'' <br>
<br>
''Rwest81 tried to tempt Justnet to the chair by pointing out the lustrous bunny ears that had been stapled upon it, but Justnet claimed it was unappealing for [[Reasons]] and that she had an allergy to bunny ears besides.'' <br>
<br>
''EdTheCabinet protested that bunny ears are universal décor and did take up the Holy Stapler and begin to staple. Rwest81 did also take up the Holy Stapler and soon produced the first image of Bunny Staplus: [[Charlie with Bunny Ears]].'' <br>
<br>
''Soon after, Rwest81 did prove that EdtheCabinet was correct in his assertion that bunny ears are universal by stapling ears to his [[cabinet]].'' <br>
<br>
''[[TwistedStitcherFGE]] did then join the merriment by commenting upon the stapled image of Charlie and Justnet reversed her opinion of Bunny Ears stating that they made [[Charlie]] more festive than before.'' <br>
<br>
''Rwest81 did then turn the stapler upon herself, bedecking herself with stapled bunny ears. The holiday was close to being fully formed.'' <br>
<br>
''Justnet and Rwest81 did celebrate the new festivity of their ears and Rwest81 did utter the fateful words “Bunny Staplus” and the [[Cpaag|CPAAGg]] holiday was born into being with a celebratory stapling upon the chest of [[Bowen]] whose impressive cleavage now sports the ears of Staplus with a bell between.'' <br>
<br>
''And the First Prophet, edthecabinet did [[Blingee the CPaAG Nativity]]. And it was good.''</blockquote>
<br>
'''See index: [[Bunny Staplus Index]]'''




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Revision as of 18:02, 2 December 2017

According to the holy texts, the Legend of Bunny Staplus is as follows:

In Post 87 EdtheCabinet prophet of Bunny Staplus did say


  1. We’re not in Kansas anymore?
  2. (Who am I kidding, if the Rapture happened, I would so totally be one of the people left behind to raid all the taco Hells and re-colonize IKEA. So yeah, the zombies can wait until Easter. Remind me to stock up on bunny ears and staples.)
  3. THE ALPACA FLIES AT MIDNIGHT?
  4. …pation.


And the seed of the Staplus was planted. And the seed did take root in the mind of Justnet who then said “I just totally pictured you going around Ikea stapling bunny ears to random pieces of furniture.”

EdtheCabinet did reply: “(I was thinking zombies, but, you know, furniture should have ears, now that you mention it…)” and Rwest81 did take up the Holy Stapler and produced this image for the delectation of the posters.

And the posters did mark the image as interesting, funny, agree, and love. And Justnet did protest that the chair was ugly, and that EdtheCabinet should not have begun stapling without her, and EdtheCabinet was sore upset that Justnet should have seen the chair, which was to have been her Cthulhumas present and disharmony did threaten the Nativity Thread.

Then Rwest81 did apologize for ruining the surprise, and EdtheCabinet did accept her apology and harmony was restored.

Rwest81 tried to tempt Justnet to the chair by pointing out the lustrous bunny ears that had been stapled upon it, but Justnet claimed it was unappealing for Reasons and that she had an allergy to bunny ears besides.

EdTheCabinet protested that bunny ears are universal décor and did take up the Holy Stapler and begin to staple. Rwest81 did also take up the Holy Stapler and soon produced the first image of Bunny Staplus: Charlie with Bunny Ears.

Soon after, Rwest81 did prove that EdtheCabinet was correct in his assertion that bunny ears are universal by stapling ears to his cabinet.

TwistedStitcherFGE did then join the merriment by commenting upon the stapled image of Charlie and Justnet reversed her opinion of Bunny Ears stating that they made Charlie more festive than before.

Rwest81 did then turn the stapler upon herself, bedecking herself with stapled bunny ears. The holiday was close to being fully formed.

Justnet and Rwest81 did celebrate the new festivity of their ears and Rwest81 did utter the fateful words “Bunny Staplus” and the CPAAGg holiday was born into being with a celebratory stapling upon the chest of Bowen whose impressive cleavage now sports the ears of Staplus with a bell between.

And the First Prophet, edthecabinet did Blingee the CPaAG Nativity. And it was good.


See index: Bunny Staplus Index


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